Sex Toys for LBGs (Late Breaking Gays)

As a LBG (Late Breaking Gay) you may be new to sex toys. If you are single sex toys can be a lot of fun in the shower, jacking off with porn or just learning more about yourself.

There are an almost infinite variety of sex toys but I can recommend a few:


Cock rings: Cock rings are a ring of rubber (think "O" ring)

 or silicone or metal that goes around your cock and/or balls. The cock ring can go just around the base of your cock or around your balls and cock.  Just as cocks come in all different sizes so do cock rings.  You can get a set of different sized cock rings or try a couple of different stretchy ones at first then you can experiment with the hard ones.  It should gently restrict the flow of blood out of the cock to keep your dick harder for longer.

Dildos: a dildo is a hard rubber shaft that goes up your ass. Dildos can look like a cock even with balls but they also come in a wild variety of shapes and sizes. If you have never used a dildo start with a small dildo with lots of lube and work up to larger ones as you get comfortable.

 

 

Douche: just to keep things neat and clean - clean out your ass before you use a dildo or have sex. You and your partner will appreciate it.  There are inexpensive enema kits available at the drug store or you can get kinkier ones on-line. I prefer a wand that hooks into the shower like a shower wand. But don't overdo it - if you clean out too deep you will have diarrhea for a week. I recommend cleaning out in the shower – hold the water in your ass and then move over to the stool to release it. Repeat until you run clear - but again - don't overdo it.

Allow me to recommend Fort Troff Sex Toys as a good source. They have everything from tame to wild.

 

Squealing Like Little Girls / Roaring Like Lions

You know the sound little girls make when they scream?  

When we are having sex we scream like that.

We scream till the windows rattle. 
We scream like we are being murdered. 
We scream like we just stepped on a snake.  
We scream until all the air is gone from our lungs then we gasp in air and scream again. 

Oh there is lots of panting and oohs and aah and even the roars of lions and tigers and bears - but it is that high pitched primal squeal of joy that I like the best.

Unfortunately the dog doesn't like it much.

Sex School

Do you have a degree in sex?

Did you take any classes in sex?

Oh I’m not talking about “sex education” in High School. That was a joke!

What is it about sex? We can take classes in ceramics or German or take educational vacations to immerse ourselves in a foreign culture. But how do you learn sex?

Of course most people learn sex by experimentation. But that doesn’t make sense. Even in a heterosexual relationship, don’t you want to be the perfect lover? How are you going to be even a adequate lover (yuck) if you have never had sex before and have never learned how to have sex?

There is this terrible assumption that sex is so instinctive that you don’t need any instruction. If you can figure out what hole to put it in you are going to be just fine. WHAT BULLSHIT! That means making lots of mistakes in one of the most important and fulfilling parts of our lives. That seems pretty stupid.

Of course you can watch porn or read “Joy of Sex”. Actually you could watch porn on the net 24/7 and never repeat in a year. And then there are tons of books and magazines that deal with sex. Even at the grocery store check out line the magazines (Cosmo and Men's Health come to mind) say right on th cover that they have lists of "secret" tips on how to please your partner.

I suppose that is better than nothing. But when I go to the gym I can get the assistance of a personal coach – hell I can hire one to come out to the house. Why can’t I get a personal coach for sex?

In India they have the Kama Sutra and in some Arab cultures I understand that fathers teach their sons how to jack off. But in our nice puritanical American culture you are left to pick up technique in the locker room.

Does it make sense that you can hire a sex therapist if you have trouble or go to a sex addiction clinic if you are in over your head? (thanks Tiger – I can’t imagine what those sessions are like.) But you can’t get trained before you start having sex! Hell, you have to pass a test to get a driver’s license, why not to have sex – the world would be a better place.

Now let me take this home – if you will – how does a middle age man, just coming out of the closet, figure out gay sex? Once again you could assume that all you have to do is find the right hole. But how do you learn how to give a blow job or how to suck balls or how to eat ass or how to be a top or how to be a bottom? How do you learn those things?

Now don’t get me wrong, lots and lots of experimentation with lots of lovers has its “up” side. But I have one other suggestion, talk to and listen to your lover. Go ahead, talk about the sex. Ask questions. “What felt good?” “What would you like to try?” “What have you done with other guys you would like to try with me?” Watch porn together and ask “Would you like to try that?”

If you have an open relationship like my partner and I have, pay attention to what he enjoys in a 3 way. And I know this one is tough, but listen when he describes the sex he had with someone while he was away on business. It would be easy to be jealous or insecure, but I suggest that if you talk about sex you and your partner have had with others, it will help you find out what really turns you and your partner on.

Open relationships can screw up people who aren’t honest. Or it can bring new levels of passion to a relationship. It can take you and your partner from predictable to “rock star.” Now that is sex school!

Forever 18

One of the most wonderful and unexpected aspects of being a Late Breaking Gay (LBG) is that, in regards to sex, I am forever 18. Really! I know that sounds pretty presumptuous but it is really like that.

This is a condition that has been confirmed by many other men. (Please feel free to comment on this here if you like.) In fact I have one friend that has a formula for every decade that you are over 30 when you come out subtract one year from 20 and that is the sexual age that you are for the rest of your life. So I was two decades past 20, so 20 - 2 = 18.

It is like all of the gay sex that I didn't get for 40 years has just been stored up. When I came out, my gay sex age was still right where it should have started. OK I will be specific about this. Not only do I want sex every day (or a couple times a day) but sex can last for hours and I have multiple (5 or 6) every time I have sex. It isn't bragging if it is a fact and I have witnesses.

So many men, so much sex, so little time.