Saturday, April 17, 2010

The X Got Remarried

My X wife got remarried.

That’s it. No drama, no trauma.

My X didn’t tell me. My kids didn’t tell me. My Mother told me almost in passing. She saw her picture on Facebook holding a bouquet with a new last name.

It is a non-event.

And yet – somehow I felt bad. Maybe guilty that I wasn’t who I thought I was or who I promised that I would be.

I should be glad that she has found happiness and stability after what I did to her life. And I am. Yet – it makes the pain of walking away from that life – even though it was a lie of a life – it makes the pain fresh again.

I love my new life – but as a LBG (Late Breaking Gay) I must say that more than 30 years in the closet are very hard on a person. Coming out, as they say “better late than never”, is the best thing that a person can do for themselves. But being a LBG (Late Breaking Gay) isn't for sissy's. OK - too cute. But seriously coming out late in life can most certainly leave some deep scars.

But the scars will heal in the sunshine of honesty about self and the fresh air that isn’t poisoned by lies.

1 comment:

  1. I just found your blog today. I hope you can respond to me by email.
    I am married. I am about to come out to my wife of 35 years. I am going through hell inside. Young gay guys have no idea what I'm going through. Older gay guys who came out young don't know. But you do.